in this sea of lust.
this sea of lust we're in
it's like our town
where you're next door
and i'm your neighbor
and still we have to dig tunnels
to get to each other
through all this clutter
why can't we ever meet in the middle?
we call each other love
and love doesn't seem to care
in these waters we're drowning
yet we sound so shallow
when we speak
we make ammends by justifying love
in all the wrong places
like in a sea of lust
where the water stops
in the shores of desire
all the o's in the world
big or small
could never make up
to the word of love
in this sea of lust
we rocked each other's boats
we collided in a vowel
three letters away
from complete love
and now you know
you can't write love
with one big O.
-byme.
it's like our town
where you're next door
and i'm your neighbor
and still we have to dig tunnels
to get to each other
through all this clutter
why can't we ever meet in the middle?
we call each other love
and love doesn't seem to care
in these waters we're drowning
yet we sound so shallow
when we speak
we make ammends by justifying love
in all the wrong places
like in a sea of lust
where the water stops
in the shores of desire
all the o's in the world
big or small
could never make up
to the word of love
in this sea of lust
we rocked each other's boats
we collided in a vowel
three letters away
from complete love
and now you know
you can't write love
with one big O.
-byme.
LOKO! tu dike ere pasiente de mi mama...
8:42 a. m. Anónimo escribio,
ya les ha llegado? http://www.emailmasivo.com
parece ser que aqui no se prestan mucho al email masivo
10:15 a. m. Anónimo escribio,
Me gusto, me gusto. Creo que en el poema existe una gran facilidad en describir con imagenes y metaforas sentimientos muy simples del arte de amar, que a veces en nuestras cabezas parecen complidos, pero en realidad son faciles de expresar si se encuentra la via correcta. Puedes hacer mucho con este poema, y si no lo considerar terminado, puedes aun revidarlo y mejorarlo. Ojo con "les phrases toutes faites", clichés we sometimes call them, que pueden hacer que el lector piense: "Bueno, yo he leido esto antes en algun sitio". Tus ideas son originales y muy lindas, no dejes que lo comun de nuestro mundo oridnario lo manche. (ie. sea of lust, rocked each other's boats...altho, me gusta mucho la imagen de este ultimo). Muax!
p.s.: no te vi en New Years!!! Ahhhhh!!! Happy New Year!
2:43 p. m. Anónimo escribio,
Yaqui...I must admit I love youre style. Simple yet abundant. Few people have the ability to write clean and concise and get their point across. LOVE IT :D
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